Dark Side of the Moon
by AgentRez
Summary: As Liv struggles with her guilt in the aftermath of Quinn's death, she receives support from an unexpected source. Meanwhile, the Gladiators search for answers and Fitz struggles to accept that the woman he loves may be gone for good. Can Liv be redeemed or is she a lost cause? UPDATE: Ch. 2 is up. Fitz pours his heart out to Abby about feeling powerless to help Liv.
1. Chapter 1

_This takes place a few days after 707. It's an Olitz story and a story of Olivia's redemption, because I'm holding out hope that 707 was her darkest hour and the woman we all love is still there somewhere, even if Quinn had to die to bring her back. I am 50/50 on whether Quinn is actually dead, but she is in this story._

 _This fic is going to jump around a lot in time, so I use time markers to explain. What you are seeing here is the beginning of several conversations that will be expanded in subsequent chapters._

 _Reviews are really appreciated!_

* * *

 **ONE WEEK AFTER 707 - QUINN'S FUNERAL**

The gladiators are gathered for Quinn's funeral. Liv stands just a little bit apart from everyone else, symbolic of how she is no longer one of them. At one point, she notices Marcus hand Abby an envelope.

After the service, Abby comes over and gives her a hug, whispering in her ear. "I know the truth. I know everything," Abby whispers in a manner reminiscent of what Liv did to Cyrus in 602 at Frankie's funeral. Liv looks horrified, which fortunately Abby cannot see but may have felt.

In the background, we see Huck eyeing the conversation curiously without being conspicuous.

Abby shocks Liv, and the audience, even more with what she says next. "I know the truth and I'm going to get you through this."

* * *

 **FOUR DAYS EARLIER (THREE DAYS AFTER 707)**

Fitz is struggling to hang a "Black Lives Matter" poster in his new office, but stops when he sees Abby standing in the doorway, looking distraught.

"Abby, what are you...I heard about Quinn Perkins. I'm so sorry," he says softly.

Abby blinks back tears. "You should have told me the truth," Abby says angrily. "Quinn might still be alive if you had told me the truth!"

"The truth about what?" Fitz asks, confused. "Marcus told me Quinn went missing on her wedding day, and that she turned up yesterday at a morgue in Silver Spring. That's all I know."

Abby shakes her head. "That's not what I meant and you know it! When you got back from La La Land you came to our office and asked for our help with all those case files of missing black girls. But the truth is, you didn't come back to DC to save boxes full of missing black girls. You came back to save one."

* * *

 **ONE WEEK AFTER 707 - QUINN'S FUNERAL (cont'd)**

Olivia looks shaken and confused by Abby's words.

"Abby, I don't know what you think you..." she starts, recovering a little. Abby puts her hand up to silence her.

"Stop. This isn't a setup. Here," she says, handing Liv a small envelope.

"What is this?"

"It's the recording your father made of your conversation right before he shot Quinn." Olivia recoils.

"Don't ask how I got it," Abby urges. "What matters is, I'm giving it to you so nobody else can get their hands on it. I'm not out to get you. I promise."

"Why?" Olivia asks shakily.

"Why am I not out to get you?"

Olivia nods.

"Because I've stood where you're standing," Abby says softly. "Because I've been to the dark side of the moon and I'm living proof that you _can_ come out on the other side. And because Fitz isn't the only one who refuses to accept that the real Olivia Pope is gone for good."

At Abby's last words, Liv is even more shaken.

* * *

 **12 HOURS LATER**

 _Liv is back in Rowan's living room, startled as she hears a gun shot, followed by Quinn crying out 'no, please!'._

 _The scene flashes to a few minutes later, when she stoicly follows Rowan to the basement and desperately tries to show no emotion as she sees Quinn's dead body._

 _Then Liv gasps when she hears Quinn speak in the background, despite laying lifeless right in front of her._

 _"I told you, you were never about justice," Quinn says angrily._ _"You never wore the white hat. You were never the person you pretended to be."_

Liv wakes up shaking.

A little while later, she finds herself knocking on the door to Fitz's hotel room at 2 am.

"Liv. What are you...come on in," Fitz says gently. He hesitantly puts his hand on her back and guides her inside. She lets him for just a moment, then pulls away as she starts to say what she came here to say.

"She doesn't exist anymore," Liv says firmly.

"What?"

"The Olivia Pope you came back here to find. The Olivia Pope that you manipulated Abby into thinking she could save. The Olivia Pope you _think_ you love - she doesn't exist anymore. And to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure she ever did."

* * *

 _I hope you enjoyed this and that it was not too confusing. Later chapters will flesh out Fitz and Abby's conversation three days after 707, and then the Olitz conversation that begins at the end of this chapter._

 _Reviews are really appreciated! Feel free to be honest if you think it could be improved._


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks so much for all the reviews on chapter 1. I know you are all waiting for the continuation of the Olitz scene that began at the end of the last chapter, but I wanted to flesh out Fitz and Abby's conversation first, to paint a picture of how Fitz is feeling about Liv's transformation and why Abby decides to take Liv's side. Reviews are appreciated as always.  
_

* * *

 **RIGHT AFTER 707**

Olivia shakes with fear as she hears her father shoot Quinn. But when Rowan reemerges and asks if she wants to see the body she steels herself, not wanting to show any weakness as she calmly follows Rowan down to the basement, forcing herself not to show emotion as she looks at Quinn's dead body.

After a moment, she shakes her head and chuckles. "You make it so easy for me," she says dryly. "Quinn was a problem for me. But I didn't want to handle it, and as always you followed the script and did my dirty work for me. I guess I should thank you by canceling the kill order. But if you think I'm giving you back your bones - or your freedom - or any control over me **ever again** you're sorely mistaken," she says coldly before storming out the door.

 **TWO DAYS LATER - FITZ'S OFFICE**

Fitz looks heartbroken and confused as he and Abby listen to a recording of what transpired at Rowan's house.

"You just found this in the mailbox?" Fitz asks. "No return address, no nothing?"

"Something like that."

"Does the rest of your team know about this?" Fitz asks nervously.

"No, that's why I came to you." Abby says tearfully. "They don't know anything. They think Liv's our friend. They think she's still wearing the white hat. They don't know that Liv's doing double duty as Command for a reconstituted B613. They don't know that Liv's father took Quinn and Liv neglected to tell us that for g-d knows how long while pretending to be helping us. They don't know that she _let Quinn die_ and then calmly thanked her monster of a father for doing it for her. It sounds like she's relieved."

"Come on, you know that's not true. You know she said that because she's terrified of showing any weakness in front of him."

"I'd like to believe that. I really would. But she sounds so cold...it's like she's a different person."

"I know."

"Of course you do. You've known all this time and you never said anything."

"I haven't known all this time. Only for about six weeks, since Rowan paid me a visit in Vermont."

"You should have told me, straight out, instead of asking me to look into a case that didn't exist."

"I had my reasons, Abby. I already tried going to Mellie in the naive belief that if she knew about B613 she'd shut it down instead of deluding herself into believing she could use it as a toy. Now Liv's angry at me for tattling on her, and she feels betrayed and I guess I don't blame her. I needed you to figure it out on your own."

"Well, I did. Just not soon enough. You asked me to look into the girl who was taken from the Gettysburger at 11:19 am on Inauguration Day, whose family didn't even know she was gone at first. I knew the details didn't add up. You said her father made a personal appeal, but the girl who was taken from the Gettysburger was raised by a single mother and she was taken in November. But Liv had Gettysburger in her oven when she was kidnapped, and 31119 was the number of the executive order David asked me about months ago, the one you signed and then tried to rescind only for Liv to have Mellie sign the same order. The order that reinstated B613, the same B613 she asked us all to risk everything to shut down. We're her family, and all this time we didn't know she was gone. And if we had known, Quinn might still be alive."

"Abby, I know you're upset, and I know you're angry..." Fitz begins.

"No, I'm not," Abby retorts. "I don't get to be angry. I don't get to judge because I did basically the same thing. I got sucked in by power just like she did and the only difference is that I got lucky and Huck survived."

"That's not the only difference. You asked for help getting out. Liv's not there yet, and I don't know if she ever will be," Fitz admits. "And you have every right to be angry. I'm angry too, believe me," he says, his voice cracking a bit. "I am angry that she manipulated me, and lied about wanting me to stay here. I am angry about coming back to this soul-sucking swamp just to see her shoving her tongue down Curtis Pryce's throat. I am angry that she surrounds herself with toxic people who make her believe the worst about herself and I am angry that she always has some g-d damn excuse for why we can't be together," he says, getting more and more emotional. "I have so many reasons to be angry, but at the end of the day, I know that I love her too much for any of them to matter," he admits.

Abby smiles sadly.

"Jake says I'm fighting a lost cause, that this is who she's always been and I'm hanging onto an image of her that I can't bear to let go of. Sometimes I think he's right. But I can't...maybe I'm deluding myself, believing what I want to believe, but I _can't_ accept that the woman I love is _gone_ ," Fitz says, his voice choking up. "So I am _asking_ you, _begging_ you to put aside your anger and be there for her," he says, wiping a few tears from his eyes. "If not for her, then for me," he pleads. "She needs you."

"She needs you too," Abby says. "You're probably the only one who has any chance of getting through to her at this point."

"That's what I was hoping when I came back here. I was hoping that the missing girls case would remind her of who she really is. I thought if I could get her to let me back in then at least she wouldn't have to face the darkness alone. And it was working. She was helping with the case, spending time at her old office, and she was starting to let me back into her life, until she found out about Rowan visiting me in Vermont. And from the little bit of time we had together - I _know_ she's still in there somewhere. But I feel like...like I'm stuck behind glass watching her drown and I can't get through. I don't know what to do, Abby," he says dejectedly, finally letting the tears fall.

Abby is caught off guard. She has never seen her former boss this emotional, not even when he told her about Olivia's kidnapping.

But after a moment something snaps inside her, and she is back in boss mode.

"Okay, first of all, since when do you listen to Jake Ballard on anything related to Olivia?" she asks. "Are we really going to pretend he doesn't have his own agenda? Second, do you know how we ended up with Susan Ross as vice president?"

"I nominated her," Fitz says, confused. He has no idea what this has to do with Olivia.

"Yes, I know. I was there. But do you know why Liv decided to take her from a hopeless also-ran to a viable Senate candidate?"

"She never told me, but I'm guessing it's because Charles Putney is your ex-husband."

"He's not just my ex-husband. He's my ex-husband who beat me to within an inch of my life."

Fitz looks surprised but not shocked; he has always suspected it but never wanted to ask. "Abby, I'm sorry. You know I never would have endorsed him in the first place..."

"I know. That's not the point. The point is, that wasn't the first time he beat me. Not even close. And I'm not proud of this, but I went back several times after trying to get out. Liv figured out what was going on and I told her to mind her own business, that I didn't need her help. But do you think she gave a crap whether I wanted her help?"

"No," Fitz says, a small smile forming on his face.

"No, she didn't. She was determined to get me out whether I wanted out or not. So I don't care if she says she doesn't want out of the trap she's in now. I'm going to get her out whether she wants it or not. And if you're delusional, I'm going to be delusional with you, because I can't accept that Olivia Pope is gone either."

Fitz smiles, feeling infinitely better knowing that he isn't the only one hanging on.

"So what do we do?" he asks.

"I don't know," Abby admits. "But I'll think of something."

Fitz nods gratefully. Abby starts to walk away, but then turns back around.

"For what it's worth, she wasn't lying. About wanting you to stay in DC."

Fitz looks at her quizzically.

"We had a transition meeting about a week before the inauguration, and there was a point when it felt like Liv hadn't heard a word I had said for at least the past ten minutes. So I confronted her, and she finally admitted that she was wrestling with whether or not to ask you to stay. She was afraid it wouldn't be fair to you, or to Mellie, and that the optics would be bad and all the usual excuses," Abby explains. "But really, I think she was hoping she wouldn't have to ask."

Fitz looks heartbroken upon hearing her last words.

 **TWO DAYS EARLIER**

Rowan watches sadly as Olivia walks to her limo calmly and confidently, as if nothing is wrong. But from the look on her face as the limo pulls away, we can see that she's anything but relieved.


End file.
